85,000 Black Gay Households

This article speaks about how hard it is to be african american and gay. It compares black same-sex households to black married opposite-sex households, black opposite-sex couples cohabitating, as well as white gay households. African americans make up 14% of the 600,000 same-sex couples of all races. Dang and Frazer bring to light how these african american same-sex households earn less than any other type of household and are economically disadvantaged and within that lesbian couples, the women,  continuing to learn less than same-sex male households. Also,  without the benefits of healthcare due to gay households not being recognized as married couples, for example paid leave to care for a spouse or social security benefits, it becomes harder for same-sex households to provide for their family including their children. With these households being twice as likely to raise children than white same-sex households. Basically, this article emphasizes that with a race that is already disadvantaged due to oppression  from a society that only sees an extremely  "narrowed norm" , it's becomes 10 times as hard for african american families who choose to be in same-sex relationships to survive with the lack of support and opportunity as every other type of family.

Therefore my questions are: If society decides to allow all same-sex couples access to marriage benefits, will it help these issues,  particularly african americans?

How does the african american families of these same-sex couples play a role in these issues?

African American Relationships/ Marriages

In order to repair african american female-male relationships I believe the first thing we need to do as women is LET OUR GUARD DOWN. When saying this I don't mean settle for less, nor forget your values, morals and whatever else you stand for, but allow a man to be a man. I believe that we as women are at times so afraid that a man does not know what he is doing, or won't do something right, and when we are not in control we "go off" ( which implies the "angry black woman" myth.) Therefore, I think step 1 is this. Secondly, I think we should begin praising chivalry in the school system. So many young men grow up believing that if you are disrespectful to a female , or if you treat her like you don't care then that's how you keep her and if she don't respond to that, then move on to the next one (much of this nonsense is from media outlets). No, I believe the same way we teach our babies to say "yes ma'am" and "no ma'am" to their elders, we need to start teaching and praising our young men to respect women like they would respect their moms, somewhere between recent generations this aspect was lost somewhere. I think the last solution would be communication and like we talked about in class, encouraging therapy to keep the black family together. Talk to each other and listen, not at one another. Encouraging healthy relationships,  I believe these few solutions will begin to sort of change the dynamic of black relationships.
 ~ I also believe that there is still cause for concern on why there are more black women not marrying, because the shocking thing to me is that there are not as many men becoming successful as black women. I have been single since I have been in college and even though I haven't experienced as much as these other women in these articles, I can attest to it being hard to find an eligible, driven, determined, african american bachelor around my age.
  ~Stereotypes about african american men and women have put a strain on the black family. First off women not being able to find an equal financial partner is a major hindrance, also women being in unhealthy relationships where the men are unfaithful is saddening and happens all too often. My main concern is the children. How are these roles passed down to the children and how will the children deal with their own relationships as they grow up? Will these stereotypes play a major role in a continuous decline of marriages in future african american generations?
~ The four distinct ways that men defined manhood were as an interconnected state of being, a fluid development process , a redemptive process, and a proactive course. The two top themes were responsibility/ accountability and autonomy. It is not a surprise to me that these are the top two themes because I hear this often from a lot of men. Although, statistics show that women are becoming more educated and financially independent than men, men still has this innate ability to provide by whatever means necessary. With this trait instilled in them comes responsibility and autonomy. I believe this is in all men in certain ways,forms and fashions.

Assignment #4

In the "Living in a class apart" article I believe one of the biggest issues still present today is the skin color problem. The fact that African Americans are made up of so many shades of brown makes us so dynamic. However, when we as a people begin to seperate ourselves on the basis of the different shades and cast some out and some in, or certain shades are considered more acceptable by society than others, I believe it pulls us back into a time in history of prejudice and systematic oppression. From reading this article, the term "United we Stand" comes to mind and it's sad to say that we still have a long way to go as a people before we are a true representation of a united front.
 I would add that although black women are becoming more successful and the number overwhelmingly surpasses black men, we need to sit down and think what happened over time for it to be this way? I'm not talking about the accomplishments and strides black women have made which is wonderful, but what psychological disposition do black have or gained overtime to sort of make them kind of sit back and relax when meanwhile the women were climbing the successful ladder, an equal number of men should have been on the ladder next to us? I think that once we revert back to this cause then we can find solutions on what happened to black male figure.
Only 29% of african american women between the ages of 28-55 and earning over $55,000 a year are married. Cornel West mentioned that when he began at Harvard the african american female to male ratio was almost even, however today the ratio is 9-1.In Franklin's article it explains how the black family weakend over time due to political policies, racism, attitudes and so forth and how the black male began to "fall behind". I think this has alot to do with african american male attendance at Harvard while Cornel West attended because how do we expect the black male to move forward and continue to be successful when we are in a society that seems to have put them on a back burner, associate them with stereotypes, and label most of them problematic. At the same time it is shocking that, african american males who have fallen into the prison system due to troubled backgrounds that want to get their lives together, change, and do better for themselves are continously told by society "you were once bad, you will always be bad, no jobs for you". In this case it's sad that many african american give up on trying and fall back into a life of crime and violence. The child support system is also a problem for  african american men that are trying. Our black males are becoming extinct. Only a few succeed and overcome these barriers, but we won't be successful until majority to all of them progress forward successfully.

Week 3 AfricanAmericanTimelinePart1/2/3

Event-1758-The African Baptist or "Bluestone" Church is founded on the William Byrd plantation near the Bluestone River, in Mecklenburg Virginia, becoming the first known black church in North America. Comment: The impact this event had on the Black Family was the forming of groups and forcing the family dynamic to come together in faith and be strong amongst one another. The black church created sort of a safe haven or a safe house and back then it was also a temple for political movements, community outreach, and many other things for the black family and the community to form an even bigger and stronger family dynamic. Event-1959- Lorraine Hansberry's "Raisin in the Sun" is the first play by an African American woman to be produced on Broadway. Comment: The production of a "Raisin in the Sun" showed empowerment of the black family as well as african american women. The actual story of a "Raisin in the Sun" depicts a black family, although at their lowest, stuck together despite greed and self-pity. It showed how even though women are the glue that holds african american families together, the men of the family have to be proud of themselves and who they are in order to pass that self-pride and self-worth down to the next generations. Nguzo Saba: (1) Imani- (faith)- "To believe with all our heart in our people, our parents, our teachers, our leaderrs and the righteousness and victory of our struggle." (2)- Kuumba- (creativity)- "To do always as much as we can, in the way we can, in order to leave our community more beautiful and beneficial than we inherited it." - In the "Dynamic Duo" piece I believe Ujamaa- (cooperative economics) and Umoja-(unity) were present because although the family had grown up in a middle-class environment, they continued to stay true to themselves and when they got to the point where they could actually give back, they provided for their community and stuck close to their community to be positive role models for the next generations as well as their own kids. - In the Harvey article I believe that Nia-(purpose) was the main aspect of the article because the goal of the social worker of african american family is to instill a purpose for life, pride and responsibility to the traditional sense of who we are as african americans.